Wednesday, October 22, 2008

OK....long blog...also random and unorganized...but its my heart

sooo...
blogging...the hip new thing right...well...here it is...
 im a blogger.
yay
one of the many things i am.

sometimes i feel like i try to be sooo many things-student,leader,friend,daughter,sister,manager,follower...

where does it end.
cant i just be val...
hmm...
just something ive been thinking.
i feel so pulled to fit into boxes. boxes i have built myself...and im not ok with these boxes. i feel liek a loser because i sacrafice my real relationships because i cant sit at a table for an entire meal wthout feeling the need to go talk to 800 other people. where does it stop? i want to break down the boxes and live...not just live...but live in LOVE....

i just want to learn to genuinely how to love....what does it look like...i want it to permeate my life...but im so distracted by fleeting things.  i worry about stupid crap that does not matter...who cares...

ugh i just dont even know. thats about where i am at...but the great thing is...ive been broken enough that i can be fixed...so...here it goes....

also sweet quote from a sweeeet book, "Under the Overpass"
"harmony, in fact, demands difference.  Two of the same note doesn't make harmony"-Mike Yankowski...we have to be willing to love those different than ourselves...


sorry this is all random...but its how i work...so yeah

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